We don't condone having or being a side chick, but the fact of the
matter is that it happens. Not everyone can be the starter all the time,
so some ladies end up settling into their role as a back-up, regardless
of their intentions. Just because you don't know you're a side chick
doesn't mean you're not, but there are a lot of red flags you can look
for if you think you might be.
Here are 10 signs he thinks of you as a side chick.
10. You only go on weeknight dates.
Simply put, weekends are reserved for actual girlfriends (or "main
chicks" if you're seriously terrified of commitment). There's nothing
wrong with a Wednesday night date or meeting for lunch on a Friday, but
if that's the only time he can see you, there's a good chance you're
dealing with a dude in a relationship.
9. You never get to meet his friends.
A lot of guys are hesitant to introduce their love interests to their
friends, as they're concerned one won't mesh well with the other. That
said, if he isn't in a relationship, he'll probably let you meet some of
his friends so they can see you actually exist. Every guy has that one
friend who always claims to be seeing some hot gal but she happens to be
gone all of the time, and we don't want to be that guy. On a related
note, if he's always going out with his friends but never tells you
where they're going, count that as a double red flag, because he might
think you're going to track him down.
8. He always has his phone on him.
For one thing, if you were really relationship material in his eyes,
he probably wouldn't be glued to his phone all the time. We're not
saying you're definitely a side chick just because he's constantly
texting or Tweeting or posting status updates, but there's probably
something going on if he won't let you look at his phone. Beyond that,
you're probably a side chick if you text all the time but never talk on
the phone, but you're definitely a side chick if he has you saved under a
fake name. We don't personally know any guys who use multiple phones,
but that should be considered an automatic "yes" if you're wondering if
you're a side chick.
7. He won't hold your hand in public.
Ladies, some of us just aren't into public displays of affection, but
there's a difference between not wanting to kiss you in front of
friends and treating your hand like the plague on a date. Don't get
yourself in a tizzy if he doesn't want to kiss you or put his arm around
you with his boys around, but it should cause a little bit of concern
if he won't even hold your hand when it's just the two of you out in
public. Additionally, if he starts looking over his shoulder or acting
weirdly paranoid, it's probably not because he's worried about a sudden
ninja attack. He's likely just making sure no one who knows his
significant other is within eyesight.
6. He always wants to go to your place.
For one thing, a side chick might not ever see where her dude ever
lives, but if she does, it wasn't his idea. If you feel like you're
hosting a lot of "chill" time (which is almost never just "chilling"),
you might be a side chick. Sure, some guys are just a little antisocial,
but when he never wants to spend time anywhere other than your place,
there's a good chance that he's keeping you a secret from someone.
5. He never spends the night.
Maybe he has to work in the morning or maybe he forgot to bring over
his lucky boxers that he always sleeps in (trust us, dudes do some weird
stuff like that). But if he's leaving in the middle of the night every
time he goes over to your place, it's a good sign that he may be going
home to someone else. There are some guys out there who just hate
spending the night, but even they should be able to give you a night
every once in a while. Sharing a bed during a weekend hotel trip doesn't
count either, because that seems like a classic cheating move in our
book.
4. He's M.I.A. for major holidays.
4. He's M.I.A. for major holidays.
There's a reason that both February 13 and 15 are known as "National
Side Chick Day" by different groups of people. When he's gone for every
major holiday (particularly ones usually celebrated with loved ones),
it's not all that unlikely that you're just one of the ladies he's got
coming off of the bench for him. We're not saying that he's not just
spending Christmas, Halloween, Easter, Thanksgiving, Valentine's Day,
and the others with his family, but you may want to consider how serious
he's really taking you if he's not spending at least a few of those
with you. If he's not seeing you on Valentine's Day, you're probably not
the only one getting his invitation to make it up to you on Arbor Day.
3. His "sister" in photos looks nothing like him.
Isn't it weird how he and his parents are all tall brunettes but his
sister is a short blonde in all of the photos you see? And does it
strike you as strange that they're way more affectionate than you've
ever been with your siblings? Maybe it really is his sister who he's
always hugging in Facebook photos and they just happened to get very
different dominant genes, or maybe it's really his main chick. While
we're at that, it should be a major warning shot if he won't allow you
into whatever social media he has, but we're definitely not saying you
should make a fake account just to find out, because if you were wrong
and he finds out... That's a wee bit stalker-ish.
2. He's "not into labels" on relationships.
2. He's "not into labels" on relationships.
Sure, some guys might just be a little afraid of a relationship due
to previous relationships or general lack of trust, but if every time
you ask him about the status of the two of you he dives away from the
topic with an "I don't like labels" or a "let's just be us" then you
probably should look into whether or not he's actually single in the
first place. To be fair, if you never ask, then he never has to answer,
so that's kinda your own fault.
1. His dog hates you.
Let's be honest, most dogs are better judges of character than people
ever will be. You might not think his dog knows what's up, but if a dog
is used to seeing your man with a different woman, you'll know. That
time when his dog peed on your purse? That wasn't an accident, that was a
message that you didn't belong there. If you want to avoid this harsh
canine judgment, go with the fail-proof options, bring treats.
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